@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

dshan

@dshan@mastodon.au

Extinction wave surfer, interpreter of the meaningful outside, bollard fancier and O'Rangers fan - #OOOOOOOO. Regrets? I have approximately 493.7 regrets.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

GottaLaff, to legal
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

#TrumpTrial 🧵starts HERE. #Trump #legal

Remember: I cannot reply while live-posting, so plz use NFL (Not For Laffy.. no hashtag) so I can skip your replies. THANK YOU.

1/…More color from Pagliery:

Eric Trump just swapped seats with Rep. Donalds just in time for the congressman to appear in photos behind Trump's defense table.

That's what this trial is now for Trump, a political photo opp.

More...

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@GottaLaff NFL Meanwhile at lunch Eric Trump goes to the bathroom to flagellate himself. He knows Daddy will never love him but he keeps coming to court each day hoping he will.

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

Yesterday’s COVID shot hit me like a freight train. I’m pretty useless today. ☹️

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@GottaLaff A friend of mine recently had a Covid booster and ended up in hospital for two days, including a blood transfusion (she's fine now). First time she's ever had a bad reaction to a Covid shot (or any other vaccination). Um, she is 96 years old though and has a few comorbidities ... 😉

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

📌📌Via Kyle Griffin:

Michael Cohen will begin his testimony in the #TrumpTrial Monday, NBCNews has learned through multiple sources. He's expected to be on the stand for several days.

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@GottaLaff He'll have to work hard to be funnier than Stormy.

GottaLaff, to legal
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

starts HERE.
Please remember I don’t reply while live-posting. Plz use NFL (Not For Laffy, but no hashtag) so I can ignore those replies.

1/… Bower:

Trump enters the courtroom. Before arriving, he lingered for a moment in the doorway, talking to his lawyers, Emile Bove and Todd Blanche. He had a piece of paper in his hand, which he waved around as he spoke.

Wait for it….

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@skydog @MarkRDavid @GottaLaff

NFL

Try living in Australia — the courtroom action starts at bedtime! I spend too long each morning trying to catch-up with what happened overnight. And wondering what Mr Blowdryer's back-story is...

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

2017-2020 Uncovered Emails Reveal Border Patrol Agent's Horrific Jokes About Children

“Border Patrol agents freely used the derogatory slur “tonk” to describe unauthorized migrants on government computers, at times while joking about killing or beating them, according to emails & text messages” https://apple.news/AK-D5b6k2QeWmZuqzMOfNgw

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@GottaLaff I bet Stephen Miller is keen to get those agents email addresses and phone numbers so he can offer them jobs in the next Trump administration.

cstross, to random
@cstross@wandering.shop avatar

TFW you buy your spouse a shiny new maxed-out Macbook Air ... then discover the toilet is leaking.

Sigh. Plumber scheduled for tomorrow morning (yay!) at "you want me to be awake WHEN?" o'clock (boo!)

Fingers crossed that it's just a leaky gasket, not a whole new bathroom ...

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@cstross Had a leaky loo last week, cost me $9.99 for a new flush valve washer (and lots of swearing while fitting it). But then, I hadn't just bought any expensive new tech gear ...

georgetakei, to random

It'ssssss so weird. https://www.comicsands.com/desantis-licks-tongue-during-interview-2666188149.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=infeed&utm_campaign=linkprogram

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@georgetakei Not snake-like, lizard-like. Ron is the one person who might convince me that the "lizard people" conspiracy theory has some factual basis.

FuckElon, to politics
@FuckElon@mastodon.social avatar

While Trump was being questioned about a 2021 financial statement, Trump claimed to have been too busy focusing on “China, Russia and keeping our country safe.

The state’s attorney reminded him that he was not president in 2021.

#Trump #politics #Trumptrial

https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/trump-testimony-new-york-fraud-case-off-rails-1234870774/

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@FuckElon What he meant to say was he was busy doing business deals with China and leaking classified documents to Russia.

georgetakei, to random

He couldn't be more wrong. https://www.comicsands.com/elon-musk-cisgender-heterosexual-slur-2666109982.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=infeed&utm_campaign=linkprogram

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@georgetakei Oh, I'm confident he will find a way to be more wrong.

GreatDismal, to random
@GreatDismal@mastodon.social avatar

Scary shit. https://mastodon.social/@arstechnica/111303158768347067

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@GreatDismal I knew crypto was risky and stupid, but I had no idea it caused diarrhoea!

georgetakei, to random

So we can expect a guilty plea then, Donald?

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@georgetakei If he does end up in jail I feel sorry for the prison guard who has to conduct his cavity search.

mathowie, to random
@mathowie@xoxo.zone avatar

the funniest thing about Apple is the last version of MacOS features "video reactions" where if your camera sees you do a thumbs up or heart symbol with your hands, stuff happens behind you like fireworks in ANY video app you are using BY DEFAULT.

A friend was in an online therapy session, describing his trauma so the therapist asked if he was alright and he did a thumbs up and then HUGE FIREWORKS BEHIND HIS HEAD.

It's so bad that online therapy sessions now start with a warning dialog!

dshan,
@dshan@mastodon.au avatar

@mathowie Edge cases are a bitch.

RM_Transit, to random
@RM_Transit@mstdn.social avatar

deleted_by_author

    •
    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @RM_Transit Congratulations. Please tell me you got hitched on a train! 😉

    jeffowski, (edited ) to random
    @jeffowski@mastodon.world avatar

    #PanamaPapers

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @jeffowski No I don't. Because it didn't happen: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2021/10/07/fact-check-journalist-killed-bomb-not-part-panama-papers-probe/6018595001/

    cstross, to random
    @cstross@wandering.shop avatar

    Local congresswoman Nancy Mace said: “How in the hell do you lose an F-35? How is there not a tracking device and we’re asking the public to what, find a jet and turn it in?”

    It's a stealth fighter! Adding a tracking beacon would be self-defeating: if it's made intentionally easy for the USMC to find, that can be used by enemies.

    US military asks for help to find missing F-35 fighter jet after ‘mishap’ sees pilot eject:

    https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/sep/18/missing-f-35b-lighting-ii-fighter-jet-us-military-help-marine-corps-pilot-ejects

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @cstross Waiting for DeSantis to blame not finding it on the USMC being woke.

    Sheril, to science
    @Sheril@mastodon.social avatar

    In 1916, 23 yr old chemist Alice Ball discovered a breakthrough in treatment for Leprosy (Hansen’s Disease). She was the 1st woman & 1st Black chemistry professor at UHawaii.

    Tragically, Ball passed away months after her discovery due to complications from a lab accident.

    What happened next? Arthur Dean, head of her dept, continued the work publishing Ball’s process as “Dean’s method.”

    Fortunately, a colleague spoke up & the name was changed to “Ball’s method.”

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @Sheril I want to know more about this "lab accident" given that Dean subsequently grabbed credit for her work. If only Hercule Poirot had been available to investigate. 😉

    georgetakei, to random

    Who else?

    https://www.comicsands.com/ye-man-crashed-wedding-italy-2665053739.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=infeed&utm_campaign=linkprogram

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @georgetakei Tom Hanks?

    georgetakei, to random

    Dark Brandon on the move.
    https://secondnexus.com/joe-biden-builder-trump-infrastructure?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=infeed&utm_campaign=linkprogram

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @georgetakei Somewhat unfair to Trump, after all he did build an army of insurrectionists.

    georgetakei, to random

    Donald Trump was asked during deposition in the NY financial fraud case if he is the one with the “ultimate decision-making authority” at the Trump Organization..

    “No. My son Eric is much more involved with it than I am. I’ve been doing other things.”

    Folks, the Trump bus apparently now has Eric under it.

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @georgetakei Eric was left standing when the music stopped. He thought he got the job because Daddy loved him.

    gregeganSF, to random
    @gregeganSF@mathstodon.xyz avatar

    Breaking: British Museum sets 12-month target to fully restore correct direction of theft from outwards theft to inwards theft.

    https://www.abc.net.au/listen/programs/stuff-the-british-stole

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @gregeganSF The Greeks must be kicking themselves. All this time they could've just wandered in and waltzed out with Elgin Marbles under their coats.

    georgetakei, to random

    A contender for your Friday WTF moment. Is this even a thing?

    https://www.comicsands.com/florida-woman-mountain-dew-dna-2664010833.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=infeed&utm_campaign=linkprogram

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @georgetakei It's the ice bucket challenge for idiots.

    Free_Press, to random
    @Free_Press@mstdn.social avatar

    ARREST WARRANT issued for DONALD J Trump!

    Trump MUST surrender by noon Friday, August 25!!!

    Trump Trial date within six months!

    19 Individuals
    41 felony counts
    30 Co-Conspirators not charged tonight... Yet.

    Trump, Giuliani, Eastman, Meadows, Cheesboro, Jeffrey Clark, Jenna Ellis, Ray Smith, Sydney Powell, etc.

    The 19 will be tried together!

    All 19 charged under RICO ACT.

    RICO CHARGES MUST BE SERVED they are NOT eligible for parole or pardon! Five year minimum sentence for RICO.
    #Trump

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @Free_Press Must be getting difficult to schedule all his arrests! If he gets two or three on the same day he's in trouble.

    georgetakei, to random

    What is wrong with these people? https://bit.ly/43XTduN

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @georgetakei Well, she's apparently been placed on a "mental health hold" by her family after this so ...

    rolle, to twitter
    @rolle@mementomori.social avatar

    "There's a 100% chance that Twitter is going to get sued over this by somebody," said trademark attorney Josh Gerben, who said he counted nearly 900 active U.S. trademark registrations that already cover the letter X in a wide range of industries. https://www.reuters.com/technology/problem-with-x-meta-microsoft-hundreds-more-own-trademarks-new-twitter-name-2023-07-25/ #X

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @rolle I just hope a porn site is first off the rank. 🤞

    garius, to history
    @garius@mastodon.me.uk avatar

    To understand Musk's renewed obsession with X and focus on financial services, you REALLY need to understand the X/Confinity merger that became PayPal.

    And, particularly, the Peter Thiel-led coup that kicked Musk out as CEO/Chief Strategist.

    Here's how that happened. 1/🧵

    dshan,
    @dshan@mastodon.au avatar

    @garius Amazing that all this happened between Zip2 sale in early 1999 and Sep 2000. Wow.

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