@Assman@sh.itjust.works
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Assman

@Assman@sh.itjust.works

Asses to asses, butts to butts

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Assman,
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Woke… uh… lids?

Assman,
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DO NOT WASH YOUR BRAIN IN DIRECT SUNLIGHT

Assman,
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I’m just gonna say what we’re all thinking: humongus bazonkers

What animated film or tv show is this? (i.imgur.com)

For me the first thing that comes to mind is Tales from Earthsea. I don’t think it’s excellent or anything and has plenty of problems but people act like it killed their dog. While it has its problems that have been covered extensively, I think it has a beautiful atmosphere and art....

Assman, (edited )
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Kung Pow is a cinematic triumph

Edit: there’s an animated cow so it counts

Assman,
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It’s the best game ever made in its genre. If you don’t like that genre you won’t like the game though.

Assman,
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I’m a bit of a hillbilly and I know like seven guys who look exactly like the dude on the right

Assman,
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Please think logically people… God has been doing volcanoes for a very long time & nowhere does he mention we need to not jump in them

Assman,
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Yet we can give Israel more bombs no problem

Assman,
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Endorse Biden you coward. His opponent’s supporters wanted to hang you.

Assman,
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fastest cars

You can buy a mid level sedan with a turbo today that will blow the doors off of most cars from that era. I mean we have cars today with 1500+ horsepower with zero modifications.

Assman,
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If you resurrected Einstein and made him read this he would die again

Assman,
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The part where they have a battle over the prison, and after the good guys win they leave their newly secured fortress because some fences got knocked down.

Assman,
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Well there’s the fact that they’re selling switch release titles for full price 7 years later

Assman,
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They’re actually fine with children dying because it means they get to go to heaven early, plus the adversity it causes their loved ones is beneficial. I’m serious, they told me this when I asked as a kid.

Assman,
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I’m not rich but I do pretty well, and I honestly cannot understand how the vast majority of people can afford to eat dinner. We try to eat mostly fresh, home cooked foods and it costs a fucking fortune.

Assman,
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What’s this jaundice erasure

Assman,
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We are all Hamas on this blessed day

Assman,
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As an older man, today’s GOP supporting Russia is so crazy to me. I remember a decade after the cold war, people were still eager to go slap around the ruskies. The fact they’re so eager to kiss Putin’s ring today is fucking wild.

Assman,
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This is wonderful news for everyone involved except China

Biden Announces He’s Reheating Chili If Anyone’s Interested (www.theonion.com)

WASHINGTON—Stating that it was as easy to prepare 330 million helpings as one, President Joe Biden announced Thursday that he was reheating chili if anyone was interested. “I’m going to pop some chili into the microwave in a minute or so if anyone wants some,” said Biden, who raised his eyebrows as he gestured...

Assman,
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It’s from Tuesday, but it should still be good. Better, even. It gives the flavors time to mingle.

Finally a president with some damn sense

Opinion: This surprise argument could derail Trump's effort to delay the Jan. 6 trial (www.latimes.com)

The watchdog organization American Oversight, which is not a party to the case, successfully petitioned the U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit to accept its friend-of-the-court brief on the ground that it provides a “unique perspective.”...

Assman,
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Remember that they didn’t let Obama appoint a justice in the last year of his term, but did allow Trump to do so. Cognitive dissonance is their native language.

Assman,
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Here’s an idea: what if they were both slutty?

Assman,
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The reason is even crazier

en.m.wikipedia.org/…/Assassination_of_Shinzo_Abe

Tl;dr the killer held a grudge against this religion (cult) which Abe helped spread in Japan. His mother had given all of the family’s money to them and basically ruined the entire family’s lives.

Assman,
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Ribbed for extra pleasure 💀

Assman,
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Wait until OP hears about hunting game calls. “SEX! Sex over here!”

Blasts animal with a 50 cal slug

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