@middleclasstool@phire.place
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

middleclasstool

@middleclasstool@phire.place

I won't say a hero. 'Cause what's a hero. But sometimes there's a...

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middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

Wife took this pic of me walking into Busch Stadium yesterday. Kind of regret not shouting WHAT'S THIS? repeatedly

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@phire I do love a travel sling.

hotdogsladies, to random
@hotdogsladies@mastodon.social avatar

Just like Ben Kenobi says:

"He is more tree support now than poop chute.
Sturdy but ironically wasteful."

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@hotdogsladies WITHOUT magnet? I don't think I want to know how you do it

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Listen, the Victorians had their issues, but pussy and cunt are boring, give me Mossy Mound and Cave of Unimaginable Delights any day.

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@RickiTarr gotta say for a second I was like "those aren't from Jane Eyre. Austen, maybe?"

middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

Somehow stacked on extra Traveling Dad Energy without meaning to

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

I could see pollen just wafting out of the trees as I pulled into work this morning. Super intense tree orgy going on out there.

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@the_etrain I can't stop thinking "everything is covered in tree cum, including my sinuses"

middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

"To create a resource, use HTTP POST."

Cool, that's how you do that

"To delete a resource, use HTTP POST with the x-method-override header with a value of DELETE."

what

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@jimfl going to steal "if it hairlips everybody on Bear Creek"

jimfl, to random
@jimfl@hachyderm.io avatar

https://www.eater.com/24105047/you-dont-need-to-decant-your-groceries-kitchen-storage

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@jimfl I sometimes dream of doing this but then I remember who I am

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@jimfl also, ten grains? In this economy?

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@jimfl I typically use the 7-grain as the base for homemade sandwich bread. Now I'm worried that I'm depriving my family of three whole-ass grains

middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

I have history's most earworm absorbent brain. Normally this is a huge frustration. Today it isn't. My brain is shouting

I MAY BE FULL
OF BISCUITS AND WIIIIIIIIINE
BUT I ALWAYS HAVE ROOM
FOR THAT
SHOO-FLYYYYYY

And that's occasionally leaking out of my mouth. Which benefits all living beings. https://youtu.be/ZG7AkNPZdNU

middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

YouTube: Do you want to see Trump stuff

Me: God no

YT: How about some dude in marketing who once read Marcus Aurelius in college and is trying to be an off-brand Tony Robbins now

Me: Ew

YT: Then how about tiny cows with the zoomies

Me: ...yes

https://youtu.be/x-WURhJ7v3o?si=Tcl5OVtVazGuUMhO

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

You are going to make love to a Cereal Mascot, who do you choose?

I'm going Snap, Crackle, & Pop.

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@RickiTarr I wouldn't trust anyone who wouldn't choose Sugar Bear. Smoothest motherfucker in the history of television. The Billy Dee Williams of cartoon bears.

However you're clearly going for a gangbang situation here, which I can respect.

middleclasstool, to random
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

Shoutout to local Arkansas news for being trash in a delightful way this time https://arktimes.com/arkansas-blog/2024/05/09/beaver-liquors-shut-down-in-latest-fairfield-bay-skirmish

ai6yr, to random

Interesting beekeeping discovery yesterday. Used the new battery-powered weed whacker to trim around beehives, and got ZERO reaction to the weed whacking and equipment. I'm curious if this is because they are most sensitive to the smell of gasoline powered weed whackers, or the noise level/vibration of the battery powered trimmers is below what would trigger a reaction. (they are known for hating people weed whacking around their hives).

middleclasstool,
@middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

@ai6yr Mine stung me on the knee when I used a battery trimmer just yesterday. They don't like me doing it at all. But I imagine a gas engine noise and smell would be a lot worse.

rooster, to random
@rooster@chaosfem.tw avatar

deleted_by_author

    •
    middleclasstool,
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    @rooster one of the great struggles of my life this last year has been trying to figure out how to phonetically write that sound out, and when I compare notes with others I just get more confused

    middleclasstool,
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    @rooster oh thank god that's in the same ballpark as me (I have done it as wrEEP!) but I had a friend describe it as toodle-ANK and I worried that I had some kind of aphasia

    middleclasstool, to random
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    Nick Offerman seems like a man you'd like to take a nap with.

    skinnylatte, (edited ) to food
    @skinnylatte@hachyderm.io avatar

    I forgot who but someone was asking about whether some Chinese chilli oils can ever taste like a salsa macha. I don’t know if there is a specific name for this but this is the type of chilli oil my grandparents made too: that it is in a Thai video tells me it is probably Chiu Chow / Teochew in origin

    https://youtu.be/k9ZwgNJ1iWA

    It’s very roasted, way more than other styles, and instead of nuts we would put dried seafood in it

    #Food #Salsa #ChilliOil

    middleclasstool,
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    @skinnylatte I've only ever made one chili oil recipe (Yeung Man Cooking) and it is simple and smoky af and great (heat optional, I keep it low for the children). I used it to accidentally invent the best condiment ever about a year ago.

    RickiTarr, to random
    @RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

    The Two Types of Vacationers:

    Me: Hey Honey, what do you want to do on vacation? I want to walk somewhere lovely and try something new every day.

    Hubs: Sleep as long as I want.

    middleclasstool,
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    @RickiTarr Ooh this hits home. Early in our marriage, we had this conversation more than a few times.

    Her: What do you want to do for your birthday?

    Me: Nothing.

    Her: ...nothing?

    Me: Absolutely nothing.

    Her: That makes no sense! We could do so many things!

    Me: I want nothing.

    Her: But we could—

    Me: no

    middleclasstool, to random
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    I am questioning my life choices because I'm sitting here waiting for a software deployment to start at 8 pm on a Friday, but then I think about my daughter, who INSISTED on going on a camping trip tonight, and now it's storming and I'm in my home office like WHO SUCKS AT LIFE NOW, IN YOUR FAAAAAACE

    BlackAzizAnansi, to random
    @BlackAzizAnansi@mas.to avatar

    This is informative

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2gcWcpHpBMA&pp=ygUMYmVhdSBUaWsgdG9r

    middleclasstool,
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    @BlackAzizAnansi That's pretty good analysis. Only thing I took issue with was his stance that the messaging concern is no different than if the CCP was disseminating misinformation and propaganda on a platform they don't control. Just as important as messaging is the number of eyeballs that see it. There's a chance that they could post election-influencing lies here that would spread quickly, for instance. But if they control the suggestion algorithm, that chance becomes a near certainty.

    middleclasstool, to random
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    I like that we live just enough into the future that I was able to help my son print his class paper without leaving the toilet. Truly we are gods now.

    middleclasstool, to random
    @middleclasstool@phire.place avatar

    On this 4/20, I am again reminded of how hilarious it is to me that, now that we've slowly started legalizing the jazz cabbage, we've all started calling it "cannabis" like we're at a regatta

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