@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

MamasPinkyToe

@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world

I suspected he was not a real hypnotist when he said I was growing Swedish, very Swedish, but here I am, doing many typically Swedish things.

tootfinder

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

American Riviera Orchard - Fremont's premier new homes destination. From the mid 600,000s.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

It's like that episode of "All in the Family" where Archie Bunker had sex with Sammy Davis Jr. It was shocking at first, but then it brought the country together.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I JUST WANT TO CLIP YOUR FUCKING NAILS! Jesus fucking Christ.

  • a rebuttal to the Serenity Prayer
MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

I have so many pockets! All I need is some weapons to stash in them.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

A woman said she was hungry and I gave her a donut, but for all I know she just sold the donut for drugs.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

I can hear men on their phones speaking a foreign language called "business."

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

For the purpose of social media, a perfectly serviceable royal family can be cobbled together from old Sears catalogue photographs.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

Everything is fine. Everything is just fine.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

I've never been in the vicinity of someone who used "cuck" in a serious way.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

Is it just me or is the universe just a little bit off ever since Adele lost weight?

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

He did it every Sunday, after mowing the grass. He would put up his feet, open a beer, and watch a movie about the theft of a Gatling gun. That was the high point of your dad's week.

MamasPinkyToe, to random
@MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

"Mom, you rock!" Little suck-up.

GeekSusie, to random
@GeekSusie@mastodon.world avatar

deleted_by_author

    •
    MamasPinkyToe,
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    @GeekSusie
    Those winds, that bonnet

    GeekSusie, to random
    @GeekSusie@mastodon.world avatar

    deleted_by_author

    •
    MamasPinkyToe,
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    @GeekSusie
    For my OCD

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    In the old days a woman would have ten, twelve, fifteen kids. Proving that granny panties are not an effective form of birth control.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    "Sharp as a tack" is to simile as "sharp as a TikToker" is to sarcasm.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    I can tell you something you probably didn't know about Oompa Loompas. They are very skillful lovers.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    I know he's gonna come back for me. I just know he will.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    What is the sound of one Sklar brother joking?

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    There is a part of L.A. where all the buildings are stuck-together chewing gum.

    ned, to random

    My superheroes! <3

    (None of them wanted to wear pants.)

    MamasPinkyToe,
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    @ned
    I'm counting on them to join up with Greta Thunberg and save the world.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    I'm looking to upgrade from uggo to rando.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    That pon farr is some weird shit.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    Potstickers are Chinese Pop-Tarts.

    MamasPinkyToe, to random
    @MamasPinkyToe@mastodon.world avatar

    Thinking of selling your soul to the Devil? CALL ME FIRST! I can get your soul the deal you deserve!

  • All
  • Subscribed
  • Moderated
  • Favorites
  • •
  • provamag3
  • thenastyranch
  • magazineikmin
  • InstantRegret
  • Durango
  • osvaldo12
  • rosin
  • Youngstown
  • slotface
  • khanakhh
  • tacticalgear
  • kavyap
  • ethstaker
  • DreamBathrooms
  • megavids
  • ngwrru68w68
  • everett
  • cubers
  • GTA5RPClips
  • love
  • modclub
  • cisconetworking
  • mdbf
  • normalnudes
  • tester
  • Leos
  • anitta
  • JUstTest
  • All magazines
    •