@arisummerland@beige.party
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

arisummerland

@arisummerland@beige.party

My biggest question: If we aren’t organized into human society to help everyone, what are we even doing?

#ActuallyAutistic #queer #Kansan from # LFK, Certified Listener Poet, meditation teacher, bodyworker, #typewriter aficionado, #HondaElement fan, Jewish Buddhist Dudeist, dog, cat, and chicken tender.

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anathema_device, to random
@anathema_device@bne.social avatar

Finally watched “Glass Onion” last night, and enjoyed it a lot. Probably not a rewatch, unlike “Knives Out”, but it was great fun, and Janelle Monae was so good. Amazing cast, but with Kate Hudson, Janelle, and Daniel Craig chewing up the scenery, the other just faded into background :)

I liked how mask use indicated character too. Sadly accurate.

Best of all, It was a huge troll of Elon Musk, and I am so here for that❤️ (and for Phillip. We need more Phillip in the next movie!)

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@anathema_device I'm just the opposite. I like the second movie more than the first one and have watched it multiple times. Maybe it's just because I love Ed Norton being pwned by Daniel Craig? Idk. They're both great movies.

chevalier26, to random
@chevalier26@mastodon.social avatar

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic Anyone ever tell you that you were being "too negative" or a "Debby downer" when stating facts about something? Just happened to me earlier with my family. In this case it was reasons why I prefer not to travel often (routine change haha). The whole time I was thinking, "but I'm not trying to be negative..."

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic oh yeah. Definitely. Especially when, like you said, I'm just trying to state the fact. Most people don't want to know the facts!

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

How much alone time vs socializing do you need?

For me there are a few people who are usually equalizing, and I can just be around them, so I won't count that. But generally, I find about 3 times a week, I'm game for socializing. A day in between to rest is usually nice, but the larger the gathering or if we go somewhere particularly noisy or I'm meeting new people that involves more effort, and my social battery empties sooner. I'm very curious where everyone else falls on this!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr I need 100% alone time when I am not working (one-on-one with people). I can spend days on end by myself with no problem as long as I have some media and can text some friends.

Socializing in person just two or three hours a week is too much for me at this point. I have to budget my recovery time very carefully, especially when I know that I'm going to see family. Even if I'm hanging out with my neurodivergent friends, who are fairly equalizing, I have to be careful.

Zooms exhaust me. A text conversation or email chain can wear me out (I had an email absolutely ruin three nights of sleep for me last week, and the fallout is ongoing). An actual phone call? It takes days to recover.

I wasn't very social before the pandemic started. I'd be in the corner with a book, under the table with the dog, doing dishes, or outside looking at trees or birds or stars at any given social gathering.

Any pretense of being able to survive an in-person social activity has dissolved since March of 2000 (I loved lockdown -- except for the no work part). Especially since 2021, when people started rabidly gathering to make up for perceived lost time once they were charged with "saving the economy" by getting out there and doing capitalism again. I could not go that fast or throw my precautions to the wind.

I really do miss good hugs, though.

arisummerland, to herbalism
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

I am learning that procrastination when it comes to does not pay. You have to be ready to do the work 100% when the plants are ready. They wait for no one.

I ended up missing tonight so I could process this beautiful red clover, getting the bulk of it into the dehydrator with just enough left to start a pint of tincture.

It took hours to pick and process, but wow, I am so frikken happy right now!

Good red clover is almost impossible to find commercially. If it is handled correctly, meaning it's not brown and gross when you get it, you will pay premium prices for it.

So I've been intently staring at fields and verges lately when I get to go out into the wild, trying to find places I could forage red clover without someone pointing a shotgun at me. It's almost the end of the season; it will all be going to seed by next week.

Today I hit the jackpot. I went to work out at a clients farm, and it turns out they have a front pasture that is just full of the stuff. They say it's awful when the horses eat it, because they just drool and drool, so they invited me to take as much as I could.

I couldn't take as much as I wanted because it was quite late in the day by the time I was done seeing my clients, and I didn't have any of my usual foraging supplies with me (d'oh! Lesson learned!), but the amount I got was absolutely perfect for the two things I wanted to do this week -- dry some and tincture some fresh.

I need to go back out there within the next two days to see if I can gather another round. It's a precious herbal resource, even though it's just an ordinary field weed to most folks.

The more I have these synchronicities with finding the plants when I need them, the more I feel that this slow, years-long adjustment that I'm making in my career path is the right one. I still want to be able to help people when I'm 80-something, and I want to help others to get to know the plants around them and take better care of themselves.

Also, I had a frikken bald eagle soar over my car when I was driving down to work today, so yay, nature!

A black and clear plastic multi-layer food dehydrator sits on a white kitchen countertop with beautiful red clover blossoms drying in it.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Sometimes when you learn how something works, you think, Thanks knowledge, that really helped, everything makes more sense, and other times you look up how wrists turn, and it's like WTF?!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Hahaha whenever I try to explain this action to my clients, they are gobsmacked! I try to make it as accessible as I can, but the idea that these two bones are crossed most of the day when we're doing stuff with our hands really doesn't compute with most people. Bodies are weird!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr also:

farah, to Autism
@farah@beige.party avatar

I’ve been reading about “stimming in autism”, which up until now was very confusing to me mostly because that’s the one point kept being repeated in the community being a must for an autistic individual. And I can’t relate to that at all.

Then I came across something that describes the purpose of ‘stimming’ is to deal with extra energy. Then it kinda hit me, I’ve never had the need to stim because I’m a low energy person in general.

I get overwhelmed with activities when they involve raising heart rates (yes, THAT too). I like quiet things, dead of night etc. Once at a time in my life, I was pretty sure I could hear flow of electricity.

So my question to the #ActuallyAutistic community: do you think stimming is a must for autistic people? Do you relate to it? Anyone know of any low energy stimming that gets overlooked?

Thanks! Much love!! 💕 #Autism #Neurodivergent #stimming @actuallyautistic

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@farah @actuallyautistic It's definitely a spectrum, not to over-use that word.

I tend to be more of a low- energy/exhausted individual as well, and I can usually hear sounds that other people can't hear (that are actually happening, not just in my head).

My few stims are subtle, unless I am on overwhelm. Then, they tend to be harmful, so I work really hard to suppress them.

I remember asking other kids in middle school if they could see the different color of fluorescent lights and that they were flickering. I wish someone had known then that I was neurodivergent. Though neither the school nor my parents would have known what to do with that information!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@farah @actuallyautistic YES! And the SOUNDS they make. Ughhh!

arisummerland, to H5N1
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

Y'all will find this... interesting.

I was helping a farmer friend today get her car up to her mechanic's place, which is about 10 miles out of town.

On the drive back, she took a call from someone who was looking for raw cow's milk.

She's only on Facebook as far as social media goes, so she hasn't seen any of the news stories about people seeking out raw milk in order to try to infect themselves with #H5N1 to "gain immunity" from it.

She was gobsmacked!

I was trying SO hard not to laugh while she took the call.

I told her that I've seen a number of news stories about people doing exactly this. I said what scares me the most is, the mortality rate is over 50%. One in two people! Why would anyone think this is an acceptable risk?

She appreciated the information I gave her and said that she would adjust her response when she received more calls.

Apparently she's received a lot of calls recently.

She's not even a dairy farmer!

I know 100+ years ago when we didn't have #vaccinations, #antibiotics, or #antivirals, exposing yourself to pathogens was one way to possibly gain immunity from whatever was going around.

But thousands upon thousands of people were sickened and died from things that we can now prevent or treat with drugs, #sanitation, #hygiene, #masks, and vaccines. It wasn't all bread and roses in pre-modern America. Our average life expectancy was almost half what if is today.

"Natural" is not inherently superior. Immunity debt is fucking bullshit. Exposing yourself willingly to a deadly pathogen does not increase your chances of living longer or being healthier afterwards. If someone did this to their kids? It would be flat out child abuse.

Yet, I always forget that most of the population doesn't read a book after they leave school, doesn't believe in science, and thinks if something is on the internet, it must be true.

Even and especially, people in my profession and allied professions believe the wackiest ideas about how the the human body works that are simply not true.

I'm pretty tired of the stupidity of other humans at this point. Go ahead. Drink the raw milk. Take yourself out of the gene pool. I know I can't do anything about it once you've made up your mind to do something so risky and stupid. SMH

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@mentallyalex This absolutely is what's going to happen. This kind of idol worship and health supremacism is rampant in the natural health and wellness community. 🙄

arisummerland, to random
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

Looking at the oils in the new bug spray base I got:

Hmmm. Contains patchouli. That'll be good for repelling both bugs AND people!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@mentallyalex 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 thank you for the advice!

I ever meet Matthew McConaughey, I'm gonna ask him why he plays the same character in like 17 different movies: a surf bum down on his luck.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@mentallyalex Now I'm super curious! I imagine he gives good hugs as well.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@mentallyalex I do have friends in Austin, but I haven't been for a number of years because pandemic. I may have to go on a McConaughey reconnaissance mission!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@cynblogger I'll take it!

I tend to think of patchouli as more of a 1980s thing, but I was a little kid in the 70s and wasn't around a whole lot of people who wore it. My college boyfriend wore it. I swear all of his stuff still smelled like it 10 years later!

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

Being a man of deep faith, when faced with a dilemma, I stop and ask myself "what would Jack LaLanne do?"

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@the_etrain He would belt up those high-waist exercise pants and make a video! Smiling the whole time.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Sometimes the way people phrase things is so telling. For instance, telling women they should be "taking care of" their husband and children. Another adult doesn't need taken care of like a child, what you want is for women to be a Sex Mom.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@farah @RickiTarr I once watched a (former) friend pretend that he didn't know how to fold tee shirts. He simpered and whined as he was sitting there in the living room trying to put the rest of his laundry in order, until his wife came over and started folding all of his tee shirts for him. I don't know why they bonded over learned helplessness like that. It was gross. It was also an incredibly weird thing to do while a friend (me) was visiting, but he was a weird person.

arisummerland, to random
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

Legit, harpsichords do have basically only one volume: LOUD. #Monsterdon

ottaross, to random
@ottaross@mastodon.social avatar

Should I be expecting the Spanish Inquisition?

#monsterdon

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@ottaross I don't see any comfy chairs in there...

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Would half chicken half ducks be called Chucks or Dickens?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Chucks! And they'd be so awkward and gangly, these birds.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

What is your dream road trip? Where would you start? Where would you end up? What stops would you make along the way? It can be short or long, whatever interests you!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar
Alice, to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

Throwback to the start of the pandemic when we were all going crazy in lockdown and I ordered a gigantic poster of my husband and our cat.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice Alice, this is magical AF. i'm glad you have documentation of it!

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

What is the thing(s) that attracts you to a person romantically or otherwise?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr For me, apparently it's unmasked neurodivergence.

But nowadays I seek only friends, not romance. Been working to unlearn all the cishet patriarchal BS about "love" that was force-fed to me by the world.

It's a helluva task.

Ilovechai, to actuallyaudhd

I don't have the spoons to explain why I feel my neurodivergence is making this worse, but I need feedback or insight from other ND people on a unique experience. This will be a long thread (added in replies) but I'm hopeful there will be a few kind readers who either relate or have something supportive to share.
Here goes:
1/
@actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd


arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd

I don't go on discord much, but yes. There is this group:

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Okay, since I'm on laundry today, a little story.

When hubs and I first got married, we were very much enjoying our little Honeymoon Bubble, and we were being lazy as Hell. We didn't do many chores, but the laundry we really let go. We weren't wearing many clothes at home anyway, so why bother. Anyhow, after weeks we finally reached the swimming suit bottoms situation, and decided it was time. It was loads and loads of laundry that needed done, so I had my husband back the trunk of the car up to a window of the house, then he popped the trunk, and I started tossing laundry out of the window into the trunk. We went to the bank, got about $30 bucks in quarters, and found the emptiest laundry mat we could, and did it all in one fell swoop. We folded it all and loaded it back into the car using those wheeled laundry carts. We never let it get that bad again, and decided it was time to be adults, and do regular chores, but it still makes me laugh imagining what the neighbors and the laundry attendant thought.

Feel free to share your own laundry story, if you feel like it, I love hearing people's stories!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Here's another one, not very cheerful, though: after my dad passed, I realized what a terrible laundry situation he had actually been in. He always held a lot of his cards close to his chest, and never really told me about his major troubles, even though I moved back home specifically to help him have an easier life.

He was living with an absurdly old washing machine, and occasionally he would slip up and hint at what he had to do to keep it going. He had these little rituals of jiggling the knob and turning it off and on again to try to get an entire laundry cycle done. I don't know why he refused to replace the washer.

When we were cleaning out his house, I found a small, sad load of five sets of boxer shorts, nothing more, plastered to the inside of the washing machine, dried, but clean.

I also found an entire tub of old tee shirts and jeans that he had basically abandoned because he couldn't wash large loads at all, only the essentials. I brought these home and had to run them two or three times through the washer before giving them away to Goodwill or keeping them for painting rags.

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