#Asstodon time with Samwise the #donkey.
When I fed nighttime snack, I grabbed a scrub brush (for the trough, before I added the goldfish) to see if he’d like it, and it was a huge hit. Miss D, as always, dove straight in to eating the hay pellets as fast as possible - she doesn’t care to be brushed often. So I brushed Samwise for ages, then took a picture of him and headed over to get a selfie with my girl. I offered to brush her head, and she let me for a second or two, and then I got a selfie. And then Samwise snuck up and gave me the very gentlest nip, like, “she clearly doesn’t appreciate that brush, please brush me instead!” So I did.
Biting is a vice, sure, but this dude is so withdrawn, I’ll take any attempt at communication. He clearly wasn’t chomping me, just getting my attention because what I’d been doing felt so good he had to reach out. So I rewarded it! I brushed him for ages and took two videos during it. Here’s the better one - I’m not moving my feet, he’s backing into me to show me where the itchy spots are. After 45 minutes, my arms were tired and I had to leave him wanting more!
I tried to film his head, mostly, because that’s where a lot of the communication happens. He does a tail-thrashing thing when he’s frustrated, and when I find the perfect spot on his loins he leans his full weight into me, like a four hundred pound puppy. But mostly it’s these glances and ear-flicks that are still fairly opaque to me.
Thoughts on #donkey#domestication.
Samwise trusts me enough to show me the really itchy spots now. I was working on two itchy spots right above his loins and he just leaned his entire weight back into me. His head was drooping and he was gently chewing the air. Absolute donkey bliss.
I was thinking about how this is what brought our earliest domesticated mammals to our fire. Ancient wild canids and desert cats can eat our trash and vermin without ever letting a human touch them! The ones that domesticated themselves were the ones that realized our hands give the best grooming on the planet. Horses, donkeys, and goats definitely made that bargain too.
It's been a very difficult few weeks for almost everyone I've spoken to. If you're clambering around, trying to find your footing in the slippery mud pit of #depression, I'm so sorry. I see you. I'm in it too. And I love you.
We will find our way out, I promise.
In the meantime, here's a sweet #donkey. If nothing else, maybe you can imagine the soft fur of his nose sniffing for a boop, reminding us that we're all in this together ❤️
Yesterday I forgot to latch the stall gate and Samwise escaped. (His #donkey brain has no problem pushing the sliding door open just far enough for him to slip through; her #horse brain can’t comprehend it and she just screams at him through the gap.) In the past he’d trot off to self-serve some grass, not too far from his mad mare friend, and I’d lure him back with grain food or by strategically leading Miss D around.
But yesterday Samwise clearly wanted something. He only went into the driveway, where he scared the roosters. They started squawking and our kid ran out to see what was wrong, and he came and found me in the garden. When I got up there, Samwise was just chilling, eating the occasional blade of grass in the gravel. It wasn’t too early for lunch, so I made some (diet) grain food and put it out. (Miss D immediately quit bellowing at us.) Samwise was still in the driveway, so I came back out and scratched him all over his back. Then, satisfied, he ambled back into the paddock to eat lunch.
This morning I took pics after I brushed him. Look at how big his brush-me zone is getting! #Asstodon
Only a few times have I had to bandage a #donkey 's wound, but earlier this week, Bodhi, scraped his leg. I normally recommend washing it out, get some topical antibiotics on it, antimicrobial spray & fly spray & leave it to air out & heal itself, but Bodhi keeps licking his wound, making it worse.
#Donkeys aren't stubborn, they're smart & perceptive. You gotta give them time. Build their trust. You don't "break" donkeys. You should take your time. They deserve your time.🩷🫏
Such a good day with my #donkey.
He’s been skittish and fearful around me since October, because that’s when I started wearing my evil (crinkly?) insulated overalls and raincoat. I spent all winter trying to work out an accommodation that would leave me warm and covered but not scare him, but it just wasn’t possible. I tried, y’all: I made myself two new coats, but they didn’t work for us. If it’s waterproof and hay-proof enough for me, it sounds Bad to him. I just tried to not scare him as I went about the daily chores.
And then a couple weeks ago, even though I was still wearing the devil’s own outerwear, he forgave me. He started chasing me to the stall door, and hovering behind me when I groomed Miss D, and he even let me serve him breakfast in bed one morning.
He’s letting me groom out some of his winter coat. I use a “livestock shedding comb” and it works great on both the horse’s short hard coat and the donkey’s long soft fluff. This weekend, we finally worked out the approach and retreat and trust thing, and he stopped leaning away and shaking in conflicting emotions when I first reach out with the comb. Magical!
Tonight he asked to be groomed all the way down his back, very slowly and thoroughly. Then we took a break, and he yawned and chewed the air for like a minute, so I cocked a leg and joined in the yawning session. (Mirroring 💯 works, y’all!) Then I did the other side of his back, and another lick-and-chew break. I thought he’d be done, but he was still hopeful, and I managed to figure out that he’d like his lower neck groomed too, please. I worked slowly and carefully from his shoulders to about halfway up his neck, and he loved it so much his hackles stood up a bit. Well, hackles if he were a dog - the black lines on his back and neck stand up a bit when he’s really, really enjoying being groomed. So many other mammals have piloerection, I’m sure that’s what it is.
I’ve been communicating with my horse for about fifteen years. We used to yell at each other a lot - she was a vicious foot-stomper - but now we have a really calm language in common. She understands a lot of my words and I understand most of her kinetic language: “scratch me here!” and “look, that way!” type of gestures. Learning to read what this donkey is trying to communicate is an order of magnitude harder! He’s still very, very closed off. He (hopefully, used to) flinches away from the contact he’s also desperately seeking. When I start grooming the first spot on his body, he usually turns his entire head completely away from me, so I can’t even see a chin wobble to let me know I’m doing what he wants! And I’ve had him for almost a year and a half. I was starting to worry that he’d never choose to come out of his shell with me. But maybe it’s all starting to work out.
Are these grey streaks dapples? I’ve seen a few pictures of donkey dapples and they do seem to get smudgy patterns in addition to the usual shiny circles. The texture of the lighter grey streaks is smoother than the scruffy browner coat.