@autism101@actuallyautistic Not just autistic people. Social anxiety sufferers too. Phone calls make me physically ill and stressed because of the unstructured nature of the communication. Anything might happen so I can't prepare.
I don't think I'm autistic, but I do HATE calling people for my own matters.
At work? Fuck texting. I call every damn person because what I need to know, I need to know NOW. I'm not waiting 5, 10 minutes for you to respond so I can do what I need to do.
@autism101@actuallyautistic quite a few of the rest of us dislike phone calls too. Not to minimise anyone else's distress, but trying to explain some support problem to a stranger after a long hold time, and half the time they have no idea, just a script to follow, is pretty much a definition of stress. It's an argument for providing alternate channels.
@rogerparkinson yes. The concept is that better accessibility is better for us all. More options means more opportunities to work for the diverse needs and preferences of people, instead of imposing a cookie cutter process in the name of efficiency.
I feel like the wording "...dislike phone calls too" treats the need that some autists have to avoid them as a preference. Although I don't share this particular need, I have found having what I say is a need treated like a want to be one of the biggest ways that people create less accessible spaces for me. I appreciate that you don't want to minimise the distress of others, so I hope you can see that I'm trying to help you avoid making that feel minimised, rather than trying to make you feel bad ✌️
@autism101@dancinyogi@actuallyautistic When you ‘can’t imagine’ how ‘hard’ it might be for someone else.
Empathy is higher order thinking. It’s hard.
For some it’s more natural but still requires curation. For others it’s unobtanium. They don’t quite get the problem
I'm unsure why I"m tagged in this. I did boost your toot because I agree with it. I don't believe I responded to it. At any rate, I"m one of the most empathetic people out there. Ask anyone who knows me. I would never dismiss or discount someone's experiences like that.
@dancinyogi@autism101@actuallyautistic Don’t Know???? I replied to a post by @autism101. I don’t see you on that post. Maybe someone later got you involved :(
I am so sorry if you found stress there. It is not intended. I meant my statement as a general one, as was the original post I replied to.
For me, the difficulty is not "stress" or "discomfort" but the way my cognition works. Talking in phone is cognitively exhausting, and if the issue resembles anything like a real discussion with someone I don't know well, phonecall can cause instant shutdown.
There's no way to "practice" myself out of this- it's one of the few disadvantages of my awesome ability to think in movies. I must simply avoid phonecalls at all costs.
Which is exactly what I do. My phone is always on mute, and my business can't be contacted by phone either.
This does cause me quite significant difficulties at times...ability to think in movies seems to be a package deal: get a really cool superpower-class ability...firmly glued to an equally troublesome disability. 🤷
that’s so interesting because my visual imagination is really, really poor. I’m very much a verbal thinker, and I like long friendly chats on the phone. Business calls not overly much, I do prefer emails, but they’re doable for me unless they’re confrontational.
@autism101@actuallyautistic as someone who struggles with making telephone calls, especially when I'm calling strangers, sometimes you just have to call them. Some people hate texting and prefer a voice.
@autism101@actuallyautistic i remember when i saw this comic a while back (when my anxiety was pretty bad) and i felt called out xd was like in that meme that says "i'm in this photo and i don't like it".
@autism101@actuallyautistic Oh god I know this pain so well... One time I had a fraudulent charge on a credit card and I stressed so much about just calling to correct it that I put it off for a week. How do people even make phone calls?
@nazokiyoubinbou@autism101@actuallyautistic had the same thing happen to me…but my bank…I was in a panic about the money being removed, but also making the call. Luckily a friend from high-school works at our local branch and I worked with her son. So I talked to her. She took care of everything. There is something to be said for small towns.
@autism101@actuallyautistic As an #ActuallyAutistic person who generally can do phone calls and normally doesn't dread them (though I generally don't enjoy them when it's not friends or family), all I can say here is ...
...good grief the amount of ableism, misplaced priorities, and unwillingness to even acknowledge #ActuallyAutistic reality among some NT (or at least not autistic) posters here is truly breathtaking ... over something as small as "please don't assume phone calls are good."
@autism101@actuallyautistic People, just people. Autistic and not autistic. Black, white, and Asian. Man and women. Let's just accept that for some of us it's extremely uncomfortable to communicate via phone calls.
@autism101@actuallyautistic I saw the picture on LinkedIn the other day and thought it was great. Because I know a lot of people/ collegues who are not autistic and prefer to write 80 emails before they pick up the phone and clarify the issue in a 3 minute call.
@autism101@actuallyautistic As far as I know, I am not autistic, but I regard speaking by telephone as a last option/for emergencies. (It is, however, better than attempting to talk to the corporate chatbot.)
Almost every time I dial a number, I'm secretly hoping no one will answer.
I have tried to explain this to a friend who likes to ring for a chat once or twice a week, but he can't understand it.
@autism101@actuallyautistic So much this! I don’t think I’m autistic, but I am an introvert. It took me 3 weeks to get the nerve to call a plumber. When their phone message said to text them instead, they became my favourite plumber ever. In person, I’m loud and opinionated. I don’t get it.
@autism101 as an autism, I definitely find myself more able to communicate over text so I prefer it but there's no end to the value of someone's voice... if it's arranged, which I understand is its own battle too!
However, unfortunately, if you need something NOW, a phone call is the ONLY effective way, and it sucks because it's not a friend but a stranger I have to call :(
@autism101@actuallyautistic I'm not autistic and I detest talking on the phone. Half the time the line is so bad it's impossible to understand what the other person is saying or there's too much background noise to hear the teeny little speaker.
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