@iCaspar@phpc.social
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

iCaspar

@iCaspar@phpc.social

Software Engineer. Tech Lead. Not a guru of anything. PHP Junkie.

I play #EveOnline when I get the chance. Find me in game as Casparius.

Also: Dad things, husband things, "Renegade Baptist" things.

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iCaspar, to random
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Why does the check take 30 minutes you ask?

Because somehow we have a testsuite that is mostly Laravel feature tests that interact with the database for every damn test and of course it all runs every time with coverage enabled. So... yeah, 30 mins per.

iCaspar, to random
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Running 4 stupid simple PRs through a merge pipeline that takes 30 min to complete. After number 1 completes, have to merge main into branch for number 2 and re-run the 30 minute thing. So in all, 5 minutes to do the thing, 120 minutes to get it all merged in. Yay!

heiglandreas, to random
@heiglandreas@phpc.social avatar

@phpday travel-curse is hitting hard. DB managed to get 40 minutes delay between Frankfurt Main Station and Frankfurt Airport.

For the non-locals: Frankfurt Airport is not even on the route from Frankfurt to Verona....

😂

Luckily I have plenty of time planned in. Looks like that was a good idea...

Sänk ju for träwelling wis Deutsche Bahn

iCaspar,
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@heiglandreas kinda like a waterfall shop measuring dev productivity using velocity, I expect.

iCaspar, to php
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Somewhere out there I think there must be a #PHP shop that's the #XP kind of #agile. Or is what I'm talking about a unicorn?

Today I start a quixotic quest to find this fabled thing. Reports of sightings appreciated.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Been playing with ideas from Elegant Objects by @yegor256
which I heard of by way of @chrokh,
and which sent me off to read Object Thinking by David West.

All that to say, the pullquote cited in both books is accurate:

"Step one in the transformation of a successful procedural developer into a successful object developer is a lobotomy."

iCaspar,
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In any case, there is a little number guess game in vol 2 of the Elegant Objects. It's in Java, and I "translated" it into PHP, started adding unit tests, and supplying the missing interfaces.
Results so far, here: https://github.com/iCaspar/numberguess-oop

grmpyprogrammer, to random
@grmpyprogrammer@phpc.social avatar

Between people asking me if I have ever been tested for adult autism and being called “needy” over the past two weeks I start to wonder how much I know about myself anyway

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Idk. With a name like @grmpyprogrammer you'd think it would go without saying. ;)

afilina, to random
@afilina@phpc.social avatar

I'm trying to make a simple file upload form in React, but because each component interferes with every other component, it's an infinite rabbit hole. I spent more than a day on forums. I want to burn this codebase to the ground.

iCaspar,
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@afilina A day without Javascript is a good day.

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

@afilina Yes. If only JavaScript was just JavaScript, that’d be different. Unfortunately most days it’s not. :javascript:

belldotbz, to random
@belldotbz@mastodon.social avatar

The link between religious cults and javascript frameworks needs to be studied let's be honest

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

@belldotbz This study, or a second one, should cover PHP frameworks.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

It's total eclipse day in North America. My house is a mere 12 miles from the path of totality.

Told my boss today, "Which will I regret worse when someday my life flashes before my eyes? Missing a couple hours at work, or missing this?"

He said, "Say hi to Zuul for me when it passes over."

(My workplace isn't perfect, but my boss is a very good person.)

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Saw this somewhere recently. Seems true enough.

"Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code is a violent psychopath who knows where you live."

mogwai_poet, to random
@mogwai_poet@mastodon.social avatar

I don't know who needs to see this but here's a 170 page document about how to tell where in Mongolia you are when you're playing Geoguessr

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1W_QK69BXMHUZXI5VdNH93_aLhTd9SQzNYhRLrh_-ZVA/edit

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

@mogwai_poet @kerban take note

iCaspar, to random
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First day of spring, my arse.

iCaspar, to random
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Today’s bread making experiment: cinnamon swirl loaf!

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Another Sunday morning and another batch of homemade bread.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Made bread this morning. First time in years. Not too bad.

lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

Wow.
https://patreon.com/lowqualityfacts

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
Of all the facts that have come across my feed, this one is the most true-to-life.

syntaxseed, to wordpress
@syntaxseed@phpc.social avatar

I've been brushing up my #WordPress skills in anticipation of a couple new contracts I'm negotiating.

Decided to attempt to rewrite my company website onto in, learning theme dev along the way. It's going swimmingly. 😁

But ug. The #PHP standards for WP are so old fashioned, it's a weird backwards learning curve.

#WebDev

iCaspar,
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@syntaxseed Be careful. That's like taking your first couple hits of crack.

iCaspar, to random
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Excerpt from spam received this morning from someone I never met who says she misses our chats and wants to catch up over coffee soon:

On my end, I've been [briefly mention what you've been up to, such as work, hobbies, or personal projects]. It's been keeping me on my toes, but I'm grateful for the opportunities that have come my way.

iCaspar, to eveonline
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

All version numbers should be this easy to remember.
#EveOnline

iCaspar, to random
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Got an impressively realistic phishing email this morning purporting to be from Amazon.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

Back to work today.
... if the whole thing didn't burn down while I was away.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

The #Spiderman2 game dropped last night. This morning, my 20 yr old is jumping around the house like a 4yr old on Christmas morning.

iCaspar, to random
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

You know what I miss?
Phone books.
The ones that used to arrive annually on your front porch with actual paper where you could look up a person or a business like looking up a word in the dictionary.
1/x

iCaspar,
@iCaspar@phpc.social avatar

I get that access to actual, helpful information has actual costs.
But somewhere the line has been crossed between the cost of freely available access to the commons kinds of things that are the basis of a healthy society, and the commercial interests of information brokers.

There. I said it.
7/7

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