@GrimmReality@beige.party
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GrimmReality

@GrimmReality@beige.party

I do dumb history jokes, occasionally pimp my angry left-ass rock songs, post tons of filthy invective at right-wing assholes. Introduced the verb "embitch" to the language, I believe, and, CW, use the c-word as if I am Scottish but am not.

Vet my profanity-ridden ravings here: https://justmytoots.com/GrimmReality@beige.party

If you are self-ascribed MAGA or a neo-Nazi, which are one thing, don't bother, you'll eventually rage-type some racist shit and get 86ed so let's save us all the time.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

GrimmReality, to random
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I believe that children were the future.

GrimmReality,
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Buncha bouzh assbags decided capitalism and fascism were the way to go, though, so pfft, that shit's gone.

GrimmReality, to random
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HEALTHCARE PROFSSIONALS: You should routinely hydrate so your pee is clear.

DRUNK ME: Fuckin A. My pee is clear!

HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONALS: Beer doesn't count.

DRUNK ME: I feel if you are just going to move the goalpost here we should fight.

GrimmReality,
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This is a microblog joke, to be clear.

I am a joyous and non-belligerent drunk. Even when, admittedly weirdly, in my doctor's house at 12:24 in the morning.

GrimmReality, (edited )
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Let's be real, if I didn't fight that drunkfuck guy at the bar who recognized me from a previous extremely short conversation wherein he assumed I was a fellow libertarian and later, thinking he remembered correctly, said "Hey, you're the libertarian guy," I'm def not gonna fight my doctor.

GrimmReality,
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Anyway, she's a Kiwi. She'd pretty likely kick my ass.

GrimmReality, to random
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I love Paget Brewster so much I would marry her if I wasn't 100% sure that me marrying anyone would inexorably lead to someone I love being sad and disappointed in me.

GrimmReality, (edited )
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Digging through the bowels of off-brand streaming sites and happening again upon Dan Vs. proffers a fun reminder that, even when Paget Brewster's characters are drawn to be hot - in this case as Chris's (DAVE FOLEY) brainiac wife-who-also-happens-to-be-an-invincible-super-spy - Paget Brewster realizes them as even-more-hot just by making them a Paget Brewster character.

GrimmReality,
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If you watched the first episode or two of Dan Vs. and found it to be dumb one-note also-ran loveable-curmudgeon silliness, you were correct, but it's one of those dumb things that punched through its own formula to become great SPECIFICALLY because Paget Brewster (and also Dave Foley) is awesome.

GrimmReality, to random
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We all have our own ways to make Italian subs so I can't tell you mine is THE way to make Italian subs but I hope we can all come together and agree that the final step of making an Italian sub is smashing.

GrimmReality,
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@Alice @DemocracySpot
NOT THAT KIND OF SMASH, YOU PERVISTA!

GrimmReality,
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@Alice YAY, you did "hornt"!

GrimmReality,
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@Alice 😂 😘

GrimmReality, to random
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When there is no one left to root for, root for Jrue Holiday.

GrimmReality,
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😭 😭 😭
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdSlX6uqRDI

GrimmReality, (edited ) to random
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IT IS @Stoned_Deva_' s BD, HONOR HER WITH RESPECT, FRIVOLITY AND FAWNING, PLEASE. 🎉 🥂 🍻 🍰 🎂 🍕

GrimmReality, (edited ) to random
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If you are British, I, as a dispassionate Midwestern American, would just like to assure you that anything hilarious you do or say to Nigel Farage is fine.

GrimmReality, to random
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At some point I have to admit to myself that I remain on the dogshit platform that is facebook 37 percent to keep in touch with buds and 63 percent just in meager hopes people will share my shit with their idiotfuck small-town high school friends one weak blood vessel away from a stroke.

GrimmReality,
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@Skepticat Well, yes, but in my defense, none of the resurgent American fascist movement was my idea.

GrimmReality, to random
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I love this because this has to be the first time in a good three actual decades that a sitting Republican lawmaker proposed an actual good policy that would materially help society work better for normal people and she thought she was being super-clever to zing Fauci and what she was actually proposing was shit she and every inveterate sneering asshole in her part would vote against in a heartbeat and call horrible communism, so, bravo you, Staten Island fuckwit, for getting justhatclose to it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hs93iRWGSkE

GrimmReality, to random
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Why they chose the bear and why every outraged whinging pantswetting manosphere alpha-dipshit should shut the fuck up forever.
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2024-06-05/professional-rock-climber-life-prison-sexual-assaults-yosemite-national-park?utm_source=press.coop

GrimmReality, to random
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So I lived Jersey-adjacent for fifteen goddamn years and never ever once knew that the Jersey Devil was kind of a cute unicorn/Pegasus thingy and thus had been named very wrongly.

GrimmReality, to random
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Not being on twitter anymore means it took a couple days to find out Alex Jones cried and begged for money on air over the weekend because he is staring into the dark abyss of imminent ruin and honestly congrats to him for finding his purpose because the ONLY activity available to online-tv neo-Nazis, be it Jones, Matt Walsh or Tim Pool, should be crying and begging for money because they're staring into the dark abyss of imminent ruin. it's like water finding its level. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/article/2024/jun/03/alex-jones-sandy-hook-payment

GrimmReality, to random
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If you have ten minutes, and you have awful fucking "traditional values" commissars in your life or family, this may honestly be the best ten minutes you can devote to honoring Pride Month. You might well take something different from it than I do, and that's fine, but I can't emphasize hard enough that NO ONE is obliged to abide bigots. Ever. They have looked upon everything foul this species ever embodied and, undaunted, have absorbed and radiated absolutely utterly pointless industrially stovepiped hate and dehumanization and they're bad people, and our time here is so so finite. Cull shit people from your life as you are able. It will help.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nm0NTlW4DzE

GrimmReality, to random
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I just listened to this again so you should too.
https://beige.party/@GrimmReality/109612796000371700

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