I'm sure that, as a nonbinary person, you've had many people tell you what words you should and shouldn't use.
I won't repeat the twisted arguments that aim to stop you from calling yourself trans, bisexual, gay, lesbian, straight and more. You know them chapter and verse by now. I don't need to remind you of the push back against micro labels, or just new labels. You're well aware of how nonbinary people are not allowed to use binary pronouns, yet every alternative is "grammatically incorrect."
What magical combination of labels and pronouns will people finally accept in a nonbinary person, you might ask? What do they want?
They want you to stop being nonbinary. You can't placate them.
Nonbinary people must wear bigots out by existing, boldly, despite them. And we will, because suffering for the sake of truth is easy compared to suffering to preserve one's fear.
If you're feeling isolated right now, remember that you're not the only nonbinary person out there.
We can be tough to find due to various societies trying to bury us. Nevertheless, there will always be someone who understands what it is to be nonbinary.
It doesn’t matter how you look as a nonbinary person, it's not your fault if you get misgendered.
Most people will decide you are a man or a woman based on any number of arbitrary reasons and that is entirely their failing.
I f a person believes that there are only black bears and grizzly bears, then they can't recognize a polar bear. You wouldn't blame the polar bear for this person's ignorance.
You are not responsible for their refusal to learn.
The pain you deal with from being nonbinary is important. The joys that arise from being nonbinary are relevant. Your needs as a nonbinary person should be taken unto account. Your oppression is real.
And the dynamics of your life should never be brushed aside as a topic only to be adressed when “bigger problems” are resolved.
Your gender matters. Your life matters. You matter.