A new tactic of Far-Right autistic folks is to deny that any #ActuallyAutistic person who isn’t also Far-Right isn’t autistic. It’s just another version of aspie supremacy bs. They don’t care if you’re formally or self dx, if you don’t agree with them, you’re not autistic.
Add to that the lack of social support for #ActuallyAutistic people through at least the 2010s, and you had a recipe for a sizable subset believing the rest of humanity was irredeemably stupid/parasitic/just plain fucked up in ways that didn't deserve respect.
A terrible world view, but one I am not surprised (in retrospect) a subset of autistic people hold. 3/3
Most of the #ActuallyAutistic people I have encountered online in the last few years have been anywhere from center-left to way left, but the first few people I met, many years ago, who I suspect now (didn't then) of being autistic had a serious right-wing libertarian bent -- the Ayn Rand fan club, basically. 1/n
I just got a very obviously sincere and thoughtful message from a stranger telling me, in essence, that the way I express my opinions and thoughts pisses them off. It wasn't a troll. It's clear I really bother them, and I get the impression that they speak for a lot of people here.
I'm sorry. I'm not likely to change. But I'm really not trying to provoke anyone.
@mattblaze This is the sort of thing #neurodivergent folks live with with everyday, online or IRL. The struggle is real. I applaud calling this sort of thing out and prioritizing your voice to others’ need to be passive aggressive. 😁 #ActuallyAutistic
Are you an #ActuallyAutistic adult in your 20's? Come join my new group just for you. We will be looking at relationships, careers, self-advocacy, and much more. Don't let money deter you, everyone who wants to join will be accomodated! DM or email me.
We #ActuallyAutistic folks will beat ourselves up over the fact that many relationships and friendships that we thought were important were, in fact, not. But it isn't our fault. We did everything right. The issue isn't with us, but with NT society and it's poor communication.
I've got some awesome specialised #ActuallyAutistic groups starting up this month - special cohorts for 20-somethings, the newly identified and those exploring a dx, #AuDHD folks, and anyone who has late identified and still working thru it. We meet for 5-weeks. Want to join?
Has anyone ever told my #ActuallyAutistic comrades that they weren’t “smart enough” or “focused enough” for school, college, or work? You aren’t alone.
We #ActuallyAutistic folks will beat ourselves up over the fact that many relationships and friendships that we thought were important were, in fact, not. But it isn't our fault. We did everything right. The issue isn't with us, but with NT society and it's poor communication.
Some days on Mastodon have such a wonderful flow. Posts go off well. Great conversations. I feel happy & relaxed.
Then there are days like today where it feels like I keep getting everything wrong. No matter how hard I try it's just one misstep after another & my brain spirals down into an abyss of self-loathing.
Today's post is a mess (editing just made it worse...sigh).
Replies I'm afraid were inane & pointless & just rubbed people the wrong way. (deleted...sigh).
Accidently boosted a terrible alt-text (so sorry...sigh).
It's not Mastodon. It's me. I'm having one of those "clashing w life bc I woke up 12 degrees off from everyone else's right angle & why does everything feel like sandpaper" kind of day.
So I'm tense, stressed out, and having an exhausting never-ending wrestling match w the gremlin in my brain sneering "Just deactivate. No-one wants you here anyway."
Time to start looking for a new instance. Hopefully I can find somewhere that accepts humourous posts as well as somewhere suitable for a love of art, animals, nature, stories amongst whatever other interesting things I've had the pleasure of discovering & boosting over the past several months.
If anyone has any suggestions, they'd be most welcome.
Taking time for yourself to rest and recover as an #ActuallyAutistic should NOT be a luxury. You are entitled and deserve to rest. Beyond that, you NEED it. That NT society takes it away from us is just another way it disables us and sends us into #autisticburnout
I want us to stop building boxes. I want all #ActuallyAutistic people to know about the experiences of others that aren't like their own. I want hyperlexic autistic folks to speak with those who aren't verbal. I want those who go to university to speak with those who don't.
I want those who live independently to understand those who live in an institution. I want those of us who are utterly disabled by being autistic to speak to us who don't think that way. I want those who experience pure autistic joy to sit and understand those on the other end.
Because we DO all have a common thread. Something which unites us, which is why we all ARE autistic. I want us to TRY to not internalize what everyone tells us what we are and what we should be. THAT is why I do this work. Because I have seen "both ends of the spectrum".
Precisely because I have friends and family who are both "autistic superheroes" who advocate for themselves and others who cannot even begin to know what the concept of self-advocacy is. We are all different, but we are all in the same boat too.
The more we are divided the more our rights and lives will be violated by those who wish to change us or remove us from society and the world. This isn't hyperbole, but something we all know is happening on a daily basis.
That isn't to say that all allistic people want us dead or want to hurt us. Clearly not. But the system in which we live isn't supporting us and there are absolutely plenty of organizations and individuals who are ACTIVELY seeking to harm us. The majority are indifferent.
Sure, I can tie my shoes (poorly), remember to use the bathroom (usually), and work (sometimes). But I still have needs. I'm still legally & medically classified as "Level 2". Only I (and often my partner) can truly see that. To the outside, and even to most of you, I'm "good".
I have meltdowns often, cannot get out of bed for days at a time, have had major #AutisticBurnout periods in my life, get hurt on an almost daily basis, almost hit by cars on a weekly basis, cannot deal with even the most basic requests, need to be reminded to eat and bathe, etc
If I didn't have the supports that I & my partner have enabled for myself, I'd be on the street. Probably dead. I think of that often. The country in which I live provides little to no support for ANY #ActuallyAutistic people, even those with the highest needs for support.
What's worse, is that to the outsider, to the random onlooker here on social media, I am a "success". I am a coach. To some of you, I am a faker or even a con artist, taking advantage of autistic people. The reality is is that I am neither a success or a con artist.
I'm simply an autistic human in my late 30's who has been struggling and living in a NT world for a long time. I'm simply one of the "lucky" ones who was forced and abused into complying who can speak to others about my experiences in the hope to change them for others.
I'm simply an autistic person who "did what was asked" of autistic people by NT society and now needs to deal with the consequences of being simultaneously rejected by NT society as an autistic person and "not being autistic enough" as well as by parts of the autistic community for being "low supports needs" and even by many in the late dx community as "too negative" about the deficits of being autistic. No matter what I say or do, someone will be angry. Someone will place be in another box that isn't theirs.
Indeed, all of our struggles are NOT the same. But somewhere in-between all of these things, however, exists a common thread. A common experience of relating to the world and how it relates to us. A shared experience and angst living in the NT world.
I believe that the labels that are given to us by those who aren't #ActuallyAutistic put us into camps from a very young age or early stage of learning about our autistic selves. We internalize them. We believe them. We recognize their truth, while also seeing their flaws.
If I'm not making sense to you yet, stick with me. I am not a wordsmith and I have issues communicating and getting my thoughts out in a coherent way all the time. That won't stop me, however, from trying.
Whether the labels are about function, supports needs, masking level, ability to maintain social norms, or whatever, we recognize that we all have different ways of looking & being in the world and also can (but not necessarily) have trouble seeing the world thru another's eyes.
Supports needs, functioning levels, masking levels, all can change over time. They are not static. They should not be a way to measure who we speak to and who we relate to more or less. These things can, and often do, change in either direction.
Now I'll get personal. I was dx at 3 years old. I went thru the Special Education system and ABA for my formative years before being "mainstreamed". I was a "success" according to the educational, medical, and behavioral models of how we look at autistic people.
Their goal is to make us "less a problem" to allistic adults as we get older. It left me with scars & trauma that I'm still dealing with 30+ years later, but OK, "mission accomplished". Despite being a "Level 2 Autistic" I can live "independently" and therefore have "low" needs.
I've been learning about all the different experiences that autistic people have.
For example a person who was diagnosed as a child, without their consent, will have had a very different experience from a teenager who is looking for answers but who's parents and doctors won't allow them to get screened for autism because they are "obviously not autistic".
And a person like me, who only realised I'm autistic when I was 50, who has a life of experience and self-knowledge to look back on when figuring out who I am, and autonomy to act on that knowledge, that a teenager just doesn't have.
I think we all wish we had support and understanding of our needs when we were children, but very few (if any?) of us received that, whether or not we were diagnosed.
I'm going to 5 social things in 7 days, starting tomorrow, 3 of which I'm running* so I am spending some time this afternoon seeking some sensory joy and planning make time for that over the next week too.
*it was a series of unfortunate events that they all fell in the same week, they were supposed to be spread over the month.
@mattblaze But you’re just supposed to acquiesce and do as we say. Then everything will be as it should. Haven’t you grokked the #ableist agenda yet…? There’s no rationalizing #allistic#righteousness and #privilege.
I was in a school district SPED meeting today. The looks on their faces when i remarked, “Staff requires training to understand the harm done by expecting children and parents to mask for their benefit,” truly warmed my heart. 🤣🤣🤣 #ActuallyAutistic
Join me and other #ActuallyAutistic comrades for my new SATURDAY group focused on those are newly identified and those seeking a formal or self dx. You have questions, have them answered in our community. Want more details? Reach out via DM or my site!