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allthetimesivedied

@allthetimesivedied@hexbear.net

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Is /c/mutual_aid sick of me yet? (hexbear.net)

I’m too embarrassed of myself to actually check but I am pretty darn sure that I’ve been sent, cumulatively over the however many months I’ve been panhandling here, over a thousand dollars, and it’s all just gone to stupid shit. I could’ve saved at least some of that and bought a fucking van already, and gotten my...

allthetimesivedied,
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Yeah, I say my life is chaotic but that is by and large my own doing. For years now I’ve lived each day as if it were disjointed from the next. And that’s a lot of why I’m here in the hole I’m in.

Years ago when I was homeless and kinda gave a fuck about myself, I could actually do things like pay a phone bill every month.

And I’m hoping that once I beat malnutrition, if that ever happens, I’ll be able to have the mental wherewithal to start creating content, which will broaden my fundraising abilities.

allthetimesivedied,
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Also Creamsicle doesn’t understand why he wouldn’t want them seeing his thoughts. That sounds fun!

allthetimesivedied,
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Compare that to the horrifying machinery of blood and guts and shit that makes your fucking steak.

allthetimesivedied,
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Creamsicle never got his whale cigarettes though, whatever those are. I think he forgot.

”Krill! Krill!”

Oh god.

I wish I could just be completely alone

I often forget that with one exception I have never, ever, ever been happy with another living thing in the room. I hate speaking—I wish I had been born mute because the anxiety that’s been tied around my neck as long as I can remember makes everything come out wrong. I wish I hadn’t been Narcan’d. When I finally fucking...

allthetimesivedied,
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Another oft-ignored cause of inflation: capitalism.

Just *one* last time for a while: I'm fucking starving and could use some help buying a burrito, a soda, sour gummy candy, and \*squints\* dental floss

I’m having a pretty fucked off day. Barely ate yesterday, barely ate today. I would probably have my food stamps back in pocket if I didn’t have to babysit a sick friend yesterday (I hate when people tell me I’m not responsible for others’ stupid shit, because I know that—I nail myself to my own cross, I care about...

allthetimesivedied,
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There isn’t really anything anyone here can say. There isn’t really anything anyone can say. Almost anyone.

allthetimesivedied,
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I used to cut myself, before I started doing meth. It won’t make the world any less cruel.

allthetimesivedied,
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CashApp lets you use whatever name you want. So does Venmo.

It's *very hard* for me to wrap my head around the DPRK, PRC, Vietnam, Cuba, etc., being more democratic and free than the U.S.

I’m not skeptical per se. I’ve just been propagandized so fucking much—I grew up watching those propagandocumentaries on the National Geographic Channel about the DPRK, etc., fr that was what I watched instead of cartoons lol....

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