Had some bad responses elsewhere to this pic, saying it looks like dirt or getting it entirely wrong and saying it's red velvet. Hopefully people here will like it more.
Dark chocolate cake with coffee and buttermilk, and a buttercream frosting.
Found some apples on sale in the discards section at my grocery store, and it turns out there were all just fine. One big bruise on one of them, but a good half-dozen more that weren't.
Tossed them in the crockpot with some frozen berries that I have for smoothies, a cinnamon stick, a good squirt of lemon juice and a couple spoons of brown sugar.
Real maple syrup instead of honey and yogurt whey (functionally identical to buttermilk) instead of dry milk. Came out surprisingly soft and light, with a crumb as you see here.
And under that, a bunch of veggies and water. And after two days of simmering in the crock pot, it'll be this fantastic, deep brown chicken stock (colour comes from onion skins).