FRIEND: They should have these all the time if the month doesn't have an R... or, wait, if it does?
ME: They're all farmed now so it doesn't really matter, but for wild oysters you generally don't want to eat them in the summer. They get pulpy because they're basically full of oyster cum.
OTHER FRIEND: Haha and how does that taste?
ME: Compared to human cum you barely notice it.
BARTENDER I DIDN'T REALIZE WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE: 😳
My first impulse was to raise my middle finger but I paused, worried suddenly about the perils of painting with a broad brush; this driver, while obviously possessing a different ethical and aesthetic set than my own, surely didn't deserve my instinctive disdain.
Then it pulled across two lanes and cut me off to make a turn into a parking lot.
I tried to convince a TLD operator in my DNSSEC class to hand out the root password so we could together, as a class exercise, initially sign their zone, but they chickened out.