Breaking News:
Sega announcers remaster of “Sonic The Hedgehog 06” Sega promises the game will play just like people remember it. #april1#gaming#sega#sonic
Prepare for the gaggle of clever April 1 science papers.
I will post a few interesting ones in this thread.
"A Modest Proposal for the Non-existence of Exoplanets:
The Expansion of Stellar Physics to Include Squars"
Exoplanets do not exist. Here, we present the framework for a novel type of cuboid star, or squar, which can precisely reproduce the full range of observed phenomena in stellar light curves, including the trapezoidal flux deviations ... https://arxiv.org/abs/2303.16915 #April1#Science
1/n
April 1 paper #2.
"On the Planetary Theory of Everything"
We show that “galaxy” formation, dark matter, and the tension in the expansion of the universe can all be explained by the natural behaviors of an overwhelmingly large population of exoplanets throughout the universe.
Furthermore, we assert that planetary science must then be the basis for all science, and therefore that all current funding for science be reserved for (exo)planetary science.
April 1 paper #4 -
"As a matter of colon: I am NOT digging cheeky titles (no, but actually yes :>)"
"We conclude that colon matters in the anatomy of a paper title. So does trying to be cheeky, but we find that too much cheekiness can lead to cringefests. Striking the right balance is therefore crucial. May we recommend aiming for a level 4 cheekiness on a scale of 1 − 5."
The authors may have found something useful here 😜
Missed this one - April 1 paper #5 - "A Unified Nomenclature and Taxonomy for Planets, Stars, and Moons"
According the proposed taxonomy, our moon is referred to as the 'moonmoon rock "star" Sun Db' 🌜