3 of 26/ On Saturday 2 September 2023, the North Carolina football team defeated South Carolina, 31-17. What captured the public's eye much more, however, is Mack Brown's (no relation to author) behavior toward Shane Beamer, the South Carolina head coach, immediately after the game.
4 of 26/ A fair portion of this interaction was quite normal. As is the common custom in many sports, both head coaches exchanged brief greetings, congratulations, better-luck-next-time encouragements, etc., after the game.
9 of 26/ Brown grabbed the back of Beamer's right upper arm (tricep).This is more invasive, more of a personal area. It's restrictive and controlling — and probably triggers many of you reading this analysis. Moreover, Brown held onto Beamer's tricep for an extended time.
10 of 26/ Shane Beamer then grips Brown's left outer shoulder (distal from his neck) — in this context, this gesture/touching is a truncated but a distancing form of a hug-congratulations but it's also a decrescendoing behavior from the preceding hug.
11 of 26/ Brown then, with his full palm, then pats Beamer on his left upper chest-sternum-left clavicle area. This region is an intimate area of our body. Touching another person here without consent implies high affection.
15 of 26/ Look carefully at Beamer's mouth. He's displaying a combination of extremely thinned-out/taut lips (anger) as well as a jaw jut (adrenaline surge) and nostrils flared (need for more oxygen associated with adrenaline surge along with his anger).
16 of 26/ Beamer semi-acquiesces, rotating back toward Brown, while Brown keeps his left arm gripping on Beamer's right tricep — and maintains his grip on Beamer's throat.
17 of 26/ Beamer then leans close to hear what Brown is saying — but more so, attempting to take tension off his throat. All the while, Brown's hand remains on Beamer's gripping throat.
18 of 26/ Note that when Beamer rotates back to face Brown, Beamer configures his right hand in a loose fist and places it on Brown's lower forearm, adjacent to Brown's elbow (highlighted with pinkish circle).
19 of 26/ Beamer's right hand/loose-fist and arm are positioned to pull Brown's hand-arm away, if Brown's grip increases. Beamer does not remove his hand from this position until Brown first takes his grip off of Beamer's neck.
21 of 26/ SUMMARY: This throat grabbing-gripping-holding behavior of North Carolina coach Mack Brown toward South Carolina coach Shane Beamer was not an accident. Along with his invasive and controlling tricep gripping, this was maintained and it was deliberate.
22 of 26/ Any psychologically-healthy adult knows that outside the context of some martial arts and true self-defense, grabbing-gripping-holding onto another person's throat without their consent is never acceptable (and of course, choking or strangling). It's not affectionate. It's not normal. It's not accidental.
23 of 26/ Moreover, this is virtually never isolated behavior. If you see a person exhibiting this once — with very high probability, they've done it many times before.
24 of 26/ If your spouse, partner, boss, or anyone else is guilty of this behavior — know that it's done to embarrass, subjugate, intimidate, violate, manipulate, control — and sometimes to harm you physically.
25 of 26/ A spouse or partner who grabs-grips-holds-squeezes-chokes/strangles you/your throat — even once, without consent — with extremely high likelihood will repeat the behavior. Statistically, your life is in danger. Get out of any such relationship, ASAP.
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