“Happiness is a trap. It can’t last forever. Let’s say you meet the love of your life, well, it’s still gonna end. It’s inevitable, whether by the slow pull of a disease, or the shock of loose footing on a hiking trail, whether it be the corrosion of two personalities that reshape each other until they’re incompatible, or maybe the old stranger in a bar who says the things that need to be said, to that person, that night. The point is, happiness always ends. Best case scenario, think about this. Best case is that you die at the same time. Yikes.”
I mean literally everything will end, entropy is the ultimate force in the universe. But while that means your happiness is not going to last, it also means your saddness will not last either. This realization that nothing lasts creates sort of an obligation to just live in and experience the present moment.
I’ve been considering watching this and Bojack Horseman based on little snippets like this one, but have been disappointed in the past by other shows that don’t really keep the energy going. Is the rest of it like this?
This quote is from the most recent episode that aired in December last year. It varies wildly in quality, with seasons 5 and 6 in particular having a lot of episodes that aren’t very good, but I think season 7 was an improvement (it’s also when they got rid of Roiland). There’s plenty of nihilistic “ha ha everything sucks” humor like this, but some of their best episodes have heartwarming moments in them.
This is the 19yo version of Im14andthisisdeep. Im19andthisis… I can’t quite find the term for what this is, but I feel like these are some pretty basic 19yo emotions.
I dunno, some people have been pretty well adjusted to a normal life in the sense of having relationships and heartbreak but also a loving family and happy childhood, while others simply haven’t and couldn’t distinguish a sincere compliment from sarcasm.
Doesn’t happen to everyone, but it’s nice when you get a glimpse of what others take for granted.
And remember the percentage of living matter in this universe is basically zero, but you are part of it. And not only that, but you belong to the most advanced species we know, in the most advanced time yet. So you are pretty fucking special just by existing. You deserve your own love.
Just as I am allowed to look for positive stuff, you/we all are (of course) allowed to feel unhappy, I think. I really didn’t want to lecture, just wanted to provide a perspective.
And remember the percentage of living matter in this universe is basically zero, but you are part of it. And not only that, but you belong to the most advanced species we know, in the most advanced time yet. So you are pretty fucking special just by existing.
I don’t think this is going to do anything for people who feel their life sucks
Sometimes it helps (at least me) to remind myself of thoughts that are positive and somewhat rational.
But of course, some words cannot change all that much.
I respect your optimism, I think you’re right in a way. For a lot of lonely people this is probably true that they can find someone maybe, even if not guaranteed. But not for me, I’m just functional to go through life and not loveable enough because I don’t know how.
You can work yourself out of a traumatized childhood but one can never truly get rid of it. Imagine double guessing every reaction of yourself, because you never know if it’s natural or if it’s because you’re emotionally starved. Imagine double guessing affections towards you, because you are unable to tell malicious intent.
Imagine the most horrible childhood, with all sorts of abuse and only remove sexual assault from it, that’s what I went through. Then you know why I don’t look as optimistic at finding love. I haven’t given up on myself, I’m just realistic. I’d need a women that has a lot of energy, to make me grow again. Like a plant that dried out and you got to water and care for it, for years, never knowing if it will ever flower again. I’ve not met such person yet, not even remotely.
You’d think that there’s a chance, but I’m not sure how to date with this huge backpack, while every conversation is focused with a microscope to find early red flags, on both sides. Doesn’t matter how content I’m with my life. I just got to accept dying never knowing what love feels like.
I’m in the same boat. People who had loving parents will never understand this. While I’m sure some exist, the vast majority of people are not going to put in the twice as much effort to date someone who’s been deprived of affection their entire life. There is zero reason to go for that over a normal, healthy, emotionally secure person.
The thing is, there are people just like you that are romantically compatible with you. While you’re mostly correct that a “normal (whatever that is), healthy, emotional secure person” will likely not date you, plenty that are similar to you will, because they’re facing the same dilemma as you.
What I’m saying is, maybe you’re looking for the wrong people. Love from a non-normal, non-healthy, non-emotionally secure person is just as much love and as amazing as love from any other person.
And you might even grow through that love, or you both will.
On the other hand, I’m not sure I’ve met anyone who quite fits the bill of a normal, healthy, emotionally secure person. Everybody I know is fairly messed up, and most of them never figure out that they are, much less actually work on themselves.
Just be aware of and frank about your issues while working on them. You can’t build character without adversity, and character is attractive.
I am admittedly, in a similar boat. But I wouldn’t want to date anyone who hasn’t been through some shit. How could we ever relate?
“Normal” people are just ao traumatized of being forced to be “normal” that they continue the abusive cycle of equating “normal” with “good”. “Normal” people are not less traumatized than “non-normal”/weird people. Their trauma is just repressed and barely visible.
This is it, everybody is fucked up (to some level), they just don’t show it or know it. It took me going to therapy at 30+ to begin to even understand the impact by upbringing had on me. I had it fairly easy, only child of divorced parents who tolerated each other for me, but still struggled hard until my early 20s, and it still has significant impact on who I am and what kind of difficulties I face e.g. in my job.
The only right and true way of enjoying your drugs is in a den, from a pipe handed over to you by an elderly Chinese man. Anything less is not worth your time.
Heartbreak, which is part of life, is gonna hit him like a train. He’s gonna maybe hate having felt what he’s feeling right now, but it’s gonna help him mature.
Been there, done that. This post really resonates with me because I felt exactly like he is describing. It really fucked me up when this relationship has ended. Now, years later, I’m happier than ever. But recovering from this took me more than a year and was the hardest experience in my life so far.
Maybe. This is probably the biggest fork in every you g person’s life. Many will learn and grow, but some will descend into a feedback loop of anger and misery and end up worshipping Andrew Tate
My partner and I would do that when we started dating… one of us would come over to the other’s house, and we’d stay up forever, then get up and go to school/work and be zombies through the day.
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