jessew

@jessew@mk.cpluspatch.com

Hey, I'm Jesse. Certified security freak. Developer. Bisexual. Computer Nerd Supreme. Drip Enthusiasts

I like:

  • Computers
  • Aerospace
  • Physics & Chemistry
  • Engineering
  • Security

I work on free software: CMSes, landing pages, server deployments and more!

"HOW DID YOU DO THIS SO FAST" - @ErikUden
"you're a genius, Jesse" - @ErikUden
"this nincompoop so half-witted 💔" - Alice
"french, 0/10" - @theking
"quality posts about people saying insane shit" - @cobra
"yup,,,, she's gay,,," - @thememesniper
"jesse, you are deserving of so much kindness and love and hugs. ​:meowsnuggle:​" - @weird_autumn
"youre too valueble, if anyone leaves so much of a scratch on you i’ll fucking" - @shroomie
"Nothing is impossible if Jesse works on it." - @ErikUden
"cute" - @val

My opinions are strictly my own and do not represent my employer or anybody else that holds some sort of authority over me.

you do not need to reply to my posts if you refuse to see nuance in things, you will just get angry (yes this is about politics, political parties, political ideologies and whatnot)

Previously at @cpluspatch

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

jessew, to random

@lea the official Mozilla account mentioned @microsoft helpppp what is happening??

lea, to random

60.7MB/s transfer speed. this is gonna take a while for the entire 250gb disk to be cloned over

oh and since the new drive is 500gb im also going to have to expand the filesystem, yipee!

jessew,

@lea oh wow did it actually break

maybe run a SMART check?

lea, to random

LMAO MY COMPUTER BOOTED FROM THE WRONG DISK and i got so confused why i was seeing a tty login shell instead of my normal one

jessew,

@lea wait until you find out the drive was plugged in, the SSD's controller just fried and now it's basically a brick that even linux can't detect

jessew,

@lea one of the only fucking ways for an SSD to actually lose your data when it dies and it happened to me

fucking hell

jessew,

@lea (all modern SSDs automatically go read-only when they're about to die, so you can still get your data back)

lea, to random

unchromed googlium

jessew,

@lea thanks for the gold, kind stranger!

jessew,

@lea oh my fucking god you actually gave me gold

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

i forgot to make this post yesterday but caligula 0.4.7 is out now.

  • i fixed bugs.
  • it works on macos again.
  • i added zstd decompression support.
  • i also made it write to disks in an Extremely Direct Way.

https://github.com/ifd3f/caligula/releases/tag/v0.4.7

jessew,

@astrid thank you astrid!

i really like caligula

jessew,

@astrid i really appreciate when people (like you) decide to make quality software for free

lea, to random

observing how my sister and her boyfriend interact, i genuinely don't understand them. especially my sister regularly talks really harsh to him, almost like she's talking him down (but somehow neither of them mind), and they really just feel like friends from the outside. you'll never even see them holding hands or showing any form of affection to each other, they're always just there together, being loud and making me kind of uncomfortable at the dinner table

my lesbian ass could never be in a relationship like that, i can't go without teasing lexi or giving her a compliment for 30 minutes ​:neocat_heart:​
i just need to touch her, hold her hand, something and it really hurts that i can't do that right now, yet this basic ass relationship gets to exist without distance barriers right in my living space

jessew,

@lea heteros don't love each other

jessew,

@jeff @lea this is so real can we get an amen in chat

jessew,

@lea well ma'am as a distinguished Redditor myself, I couldn't help but notice that you are of the female kind. A female queen among us? What a delightful circumstance! Please, allow me to explain the full lore of Helldivers 2 to you for the next ten hours

@jeff

jessew,

@jeff @lea i meant lea 😭

lea, to random

these leftists with their woke ass units. im not using meters or feet the only unit i recognize is schloinkers. the kitten is 5 schloinkers long

jessew,

@lea feet??? starts jaking off

lea, to random

they should make a graphics driver where every single display pixel is exposed individually in /sys

jessew,

@lea Hey! Please never write drivers!

BrodieOnLinux, to random
@BrodieOnLinux@linuxrocks.online avatar

How many hacking movies would be over before they started if the admin just enabled usb authorization

jessew,

@BrodieOnLinux most hacking movies would be over before they started because the hacking is always impossible gobbledegook that sounds cool

like look at this ridiculous shit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8qgehH3kEQ

guy at the end literally just unplugs the monitor i cant do it anymore

jessew,

@BrodieOnLinux there's always worse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkx6Lz6rDNc

"hacked by a power cable" sounds like a video thumbnail with one of your facepalm photos like this one

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

me when things don't work: computer networking was a mistake
me when things do work: i am like, a networking goddess

jessew,

@astrid what is state 0 :c ?

puniko, to random

​:neocat_think_googly_woozy:​ is this satire?

RE: https://eldritch.cafe/users/breadly/statuses/112152111808301820

jessew,

@puniko yet another GREEDY developer who wants to GET PAID A SALARY instead of doing free work

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

the yes command is so fucking funny as a concept. the reason for its existence is even funnier. the fact that some gnu contributors spent a medium amount of effort to optimize the hell out of it is even even funnier

jessew,

@spinach @puppygirlhornypost @astrid if you have one core maybe!

jessew,

@puppygirlhornypost @spinach @astrid hey what the fuck

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

you want me to switch to a oneplus 11? sorry i cant do math

jessew,

@astrid the oneplus 12 is only $799 and it looks pretty good

plus OnePlus phones are easy to root and install custom ROMs on!

jessew,

@astrid why such an old device?

is it even supported by Google anymore?

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

i hope you like what you see~

jessew,

@astrid it's from wikipedia too!

the disrespect never stops

astrid, to random
@astrid@fedi.astrid.tech avatar

whoa someone added an "astrid online" graph to my grafana while i was away that's so crazy

jessew,

@astrid @tauon it seems obvious that the problem would arise with any language

my comment was more humorous than anything

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