That fucking sucks, but don’t apply your anecdotes as general truths. I have the opposite experience.
Wife and I built a new home with family help on the downpayment. Doubled sq ft, 1.5x previous rent, house increased value significantly between contract and move in. Farther from work but closer to highway so commute times unaffected. Saved up enough to pay back the downpayment help over the course of a year.
I’m a massive outlier, and most people have experiences closer to yours, but it’s not an across the board thing. So fucking much of the housing market depends on location.