I slept last night straight thru for the first time at home in… I can’t remember. (Hotel sleeping is the bomb but unsustainable). My brain is mush but won’t stop. My body is exhausted. I don’t know what I did to sleep last night but I hope to replicate it tonight. Still kicking ass and taking names at work so there’s that.
I took a part time job at an upscale pizza joint in a ritzy neighboring city. It went okay, didn’t embarrass myself, feel like I interacted with my coworkers well, none of them suspect a thing.
MUAHAHAHA
I feel like, just normal most of the time I guess? My normal is what most people would probably call depressed, but this is, I do assure you, quite an improvement.
VA has finally stopped fuckering and authorized me to go to school on their voc rehab program. It took months to fuck with all the paperwork and bureaucracy (fuck spelling that word btw) but I’ll be starting with just a two low-level classes in the fall to ease myself into it.
Stuck writing my own poetry for spoken word night, I can’t quite seem to make all the words fit together in any way that is satisfying to me. I fear I may be quite bad at this.
I bungled it tbh. One of my poems was, though brief, intentionally quite vulgar and inflammatory. I had intended to issue a content warning before reading it, but forgot it in the moment because I didn’t write that down. Some members of my audience were quite badly shocked, and that shock was intended to be softened. Most people were pleased with my reading but a few were not and it’s because I made a mistake and that upsets me. Next week I have decided to read in the theme “abiding peace” and issue an apology.
Yes, they could tell, but it was shocking nonetheless. A very small amount of care on my part would have prevented an audible gasp from someone who was sensitive to it, which was by no means my intention. Mea culpa, I am remiss.
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